Adages To Survive Adultery
Many sayings have been around for years, but they have remained true throughout changes in culture and society. They are as applicable today as they were the first time they were spoken or written. There are six old adages that especially apply to surviving infidelity in your relationship.
The forest cannot be seen for the trees. When you first find out you have been cheated on, it is easy to focus just on your hurt, pain, and anger. You rarely try to see or care to see how, when, and why the situation occurred. The best thing you can do at this point is to step outside of the situation. Look at it as someone who is not involved and see the how and why rather than just the what.
Experience is the best way to learn. Once you learn to focus on the forest rather than the tree, take time to grow from the experience. It is easy to play make believe as a child or young person, but you will never understand the feelings, emotions, and passions inside of you until you experience them. Decide with your partner that this is a one-time thing and work to put it in your past so you can move into your continued future together.
A penny for your thoughts. Every self-help book, every so-called expert on TV, and every marriage counselor will tell you, because it’s true, there is no marriage, no relationship, without honest communication. It is the key to everything. Not just issues of infidelity but all issues. The hardest part is communicating something that you know will upset the other person, even hurt them. But letting it fester inside of you just makes it worse when it finally comes out, and it always does.
Its me, not you. This is the only adage on this list that is a how-NOT-to instead of a how-to. Rarely do you find a situation that is 100% one person’s fault. Even if you are the partner that was cheated on, you may still have had some fault in the situation. Do not just throw all of the blame on the cheater, even though it is easy and natural to do. Share your feelings, share your guilt, and share your future together.
Just because it’s simple, doesn’t mean it’s easy. It’s simple to get married. Get a license, say “I do” and move in together. That’s the simple part. But marriage is not easy. It’s a full-time job, a full-time commitment and it needs to be worked on every day. Every day. The steepness of the cliffs and valleys of a marriage are measured by your ability to communicate, to bend but not break, and to forgive.
Time heals all hurts. This very well might be the oldest cliche in the book, but it is the most applicable in this situation. Once you are able to forgive each other for the pain inflicted, you can begin to heal. Let time help you move on to bigger and better things together. Let this situation fade into the distance as you grow together in life.
These cliches pertain to more than just surviving infidelity. They are the secrets to a happy marriage. Infidelity is an issue that probably goes back as far as the caveman (who has the biggest club ??) Hope this helps. Hope these show some insight to how to survive infidelity.